New Year...New Joy

It's been such a long time since I've updated and I'm so sorry. The truth is I've been in shock and literally haven't been able to express everything I've been feeling. But please know I've been following your blogs and been thinking of you all so much!

In early December, hubby and I found out we are pregnant. And get this...naturally. Now considering my RE gave me about a 2% of ever conceiving naturally, I am in complete awe of this miracle. I look back at my recent posts and wonder if maybe there was a reason I was at such a standstill, not feeling led in any particular direction? Just maybe it was because this was the plan and now it's finally unfolding?!?!

At this point, I can't be sure...but I am praying with all of my heart that this could possibly be "it".

My RE's office has been amazing and has given me such thorough care. I've had 4 ultrasounds already! The first ultrasound was at 5w4d and we saw a gestational sac and yolk sac measuring on track. We came back at 7 weeks and had the most amazing experience ever of hearing the heartbeat for the first time at 118 bpm! However, at this point my RE also found a subchorionic hemorrhage in my uterus. She wanted to watch it closely and was hoping it would heal on its own. It was nice at this point to take a vacation to get my mind off everything - it really helped me to relax. I came back from vacation and saw the doctor the next day at 9 weeks. Once again we heard/saw the heartbeat which had risen to 175 bpm. We were extra lucky at this ultrasound because we got to see our lil miracle wiggling around like crazy...arms and legs!

But my doctor noticed that the subchorionic hemorrhage had grown larger and she had me go to radiology for a more thorough ultrasound. They found two separate bleeds. My doctor wasn't overly concerned since the baby was progressing as it should..she didn't think the bleeding was affecting the pregnancy. However, she informed me that we needed to keep a close eye on it and if it were to become worse or if I started bleeding externally that I would need to be on strict bedrest. Well, bedrest is just what I did that whole following weekend. I was feeling awful to begin with and hubby really wanted me to rest due to the hemorrhage.

We went back yesterday for our 10 week ultrasound and got great news. The bleeding has substantially decreased and my doctor said it is almost gone. It's healing on its own...thank you God. The baby was once again measuring right on track at 10w 1d with a heartbeat of 171 bpm. The baby gave us a nice show again and was like a lil teddy bear wiggling around. Since the hemorrhage was healing and the baby was making such good progress, she told me the chance of miscarriage had dropped to less 5%. I officially graduated from my RE yesterday and was referred to an OB.

Now don't get me wrong - I am fully aware that we are not out of the woods yet. I don't think I will be breathing easy anytime soon!!! After two losses and years of battling infertility, it's almost impossible to escape the worry. But at the same time, we are so thankful to be further than we ever have been before. I can't stop thanking God for every day of this pregnancy...every single day is a blessing.

I have my first appointment at the OB's office next week Wednesday. It will be with a nurse practitioner for her to gather all my history, do a physical, and do some blood work. I'll find out then when my first meeting will be with the OB. My RE is so wonderful..she knows it will be awhile til I have my first ultrasound with the OB so she said I could come back next week Wednesday for another ultrasound with her to try and hold me over. :) She completely understands how much I've been through and wants to do anything to try and alleviate any worries while I wait. I really appreciate that...it means so much to me. I don't know how I will ever thank her and the nursing staff there for taking such good care of me in every possible way. I feel at "home" there and am nervous about this transition to the OB...excited, but nervous.

I'll leave you today with a picture from the last day of vacation. This was the view from the verandah. As I gazed across the ocean and saw this..I couldn't help but thinking...maybe, just maybe this could be our rainbow baby?!